Tag Archives: Wonder Woman

Strong, More Human Bun Toons! YAY!

I am bunny, hear me roar...or at least make little nibbling sounds.

I am bunny, hear me roar…or at least make little nibbling sounds.

Ah, it’s the 4th of July in the States…no one is reading this anyway.

Wonder Woman vs Hobby Lobby

My daughter LOVES Wonder Woman.  Just so you know…

Ty the Guy OUT!

Click on the image of Wonder Woman celebrating fireworks her OWN way, to read a delightful article about her relationship to chains and ropes.  Not so safe for work, really…

Click here for the article

Click the bomb up there for the article

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For last week's tragic Bun Toon, click here

For last week’s tragic Bun Toon, click here

For the not-as-recently-updated-as-it-should-be-archive of the Bun Toons...click here

For the not-as-recently-updated-as-it-should-be-archive of the Bun Toons…click here

Halloween Photos.

I mentioned on the Bun Toons last week that my ten year old daughter, Kate,  was working on her Wonder Woman costume, and she insisted it had to have the Golden Age look to it, with the long pants and the golden eagle, etc.

There we go.

The pants are a teensy bit longer than the originals, mostly to combat a Canadian Halloween, and we decided on nothing off the shoulder for a ten year old in the cold, but the costume scored big with out daughter.  Her mother Keiren did most of the work on this wonderful custom job, I just drew in part of the bird.

But the costume wasn’t the HALF the fun for our Golden Age Wonder Woman…

It was the honour guard that accompanied her.

Steve Trevor,  Steve Rogers, and a gumshoe up to no good in a city that’s got friends in all the wrong places.

Those are her brothers Sean (as the flyboy that looks suspiciously like MacArthur), Taylor (as the two bit cop with a chip on his badge) and their friend Josh (as the proud infantry man ready to mix it up).

The whole 1940s effect was pretty darn cool, if I might say so myself, and as they went from house to house, they  got a lovely reaction.

Who says this isn’t the Golden Age of Halloween Photos?

Our eldest son, Kellam and our daughter in law, Jessica came over and brought fantastic Halloween cakes and cookies that looked like pumpkins and ghosts.

 Beat THAT, Christmas!  You Suck.  Halloween ROCKS.

Ty the Guy OUT!!!

Here now, your BONUS Templeton-Smith Halloween Moment:

Behold the Family Pumpkins! And take note of the smattering of blood up by the door. Attention to detail.

Bun Toons for the Family! YAY!

Smarten up, young man, or I'll put you over my knee!

Some friends of mine recently became pregnant with their first child, and they’re nervous about the experience.   I have four kids, ranging from 25 down to 10 years old, and this old pro knows what he’s doing.   Like all my “Honest-To-God Adventures” every word of this story is true.

Anyone who needs some advice on child rearing, now you know where to turn.

TY THE GUY OUT!

Here now, your Bonus Batman, Spider-man, Wonder Woman, Cake Moment:

Because everything exists if you google it.

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For last week's politically astute Bun Toon click the image of GOOD-MAN!

For Every Bun Toon Ever, click the Good-Bunny

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Happy Christmas 2010. My favorite Santa Cover

The Golden Age of everything is twelve.

I was twelve years old the Christmas that this giant comic book came out, and it is forever enshrined as my favorite Christmas comic book of all time.  It’s not better drawn, or better composed than other covers, but it was in my stocking twenty five years ago, to this day, and I cannot see this lovely illustration by Nick Cardy without being transported to my childhood home, and my childhood sense of joy at the holidays.

It won’t mean the same to you guys, but I present it, nevertheless…happy Kringle to all.

And now some “unseen” Christmas Comic Book moments of zen:

An official DC Christmas card from a few years back.  Bruce Timm drew the Wonder Woman figure, and I did the rest.

And…

My un-used original version for the  DC Christmas Special collection from the year 2000 (or thereabouts, don’t make me remember dates!).  The final cover that was used was slightly different, and this version only used in the advertising.

Ty the Kringle Guy OUT!

SOMETHING NICE ABOUT THE NEW WONDER WOMAN

I’ve drawn a couple of Wonder Woman stories, and she’s shown up in my Justice League comics, so me and the Princess have personal history.

This is the wallpaper on my computer screen - smug, self-loving man that I am.

I was also exactly the right age to have fallen deeply in love with Linda Carter when Wonder Woman was on the air in the Seventies, and have NEVER gotten over that.  AND, I’m fairly friendly with Gail Simone and her lovely and talented husband.  So I get a little Wonder Woman cred, and I’m here to say nice things about the new direction.

Everyone has been trashing the new costume, mostly because it’s a lot less flashy, and it’s not the iconic Wonder Woman we all fell in love with.

But if we were all so in love with her and that costume, why weren’t we buying her comic every month?  And why isn’t there a big budget Wonder Woman Warner Brothers movie? Or a Saturday morning cartoon show?

Because we don’t really love her, do we?  Not the way capitalists want us to love our icons…by BUYING things.  We just love the idea of her.  Women dress up like her on Halloween–

Apparently, these women are famous.

As is Heidi Klum.

I recognize Kate Beckinsale, but don't know who the guy is.

Wonder Woman is second only to “the sexy nurse” as the most popular costume for women, I promise you.

And people like to point to her as one of the “BIG THREE” characters that have never gone out of print since the Golden Age.  But neither of these facts sells issues of the comics today and buys movie tickets tomorrow.  A fondness for an iconic costume, an old TV series and a long history of past success is nothing compared to the need to keep the character moving, fresh, modern and relevant.  Nostalgia ain’t sales.

DC wants what’s best for the Princess…it’s their job.  And what they’re doing is a perfect example of  “Genre Twisting” –  a tried and true way of waking up a moribund franchise.  James Bond does it,  Batman does it, Captain America does it- EVERY successful franchise does it, or it collapses dead.

Remember me?

What “twisting” is, is specifically taking THE most basic aspect of a character or genre, and removing that, for a time.  James Bond loses his “LICENSE TO KILL”,  Batman loses his ability to walk.  Captain America looses his shield.  Superman loses the battle for truth, justice and the American Way, Spider-Man loses his costume, Green Lantern loses the ring.  Hell, Marvel completely rebooted their entire Universe with the Ultimates, and then rebooted that Universe again last year with a massive death flood.

By changing THE most basic aspect of a character, you create new possibilities and new expectations from the audience, or more correctly, you abandon old expectations.  For the first time in a little while, you DON’T know what’s coming next in a Wonder Woman comic, because if they’d take away her iconic COSTUME, they might do anything…and that’s intriguing.  So the  audience comes back to the thing that was once just a pleasant memory or nostalgia, to see what’s going on with it…to see what ELSE the creators muck with.

Sure, it’s a gimmick, but if you tell the curious new audience stories that are ANY good, they’ll stick around for a while, and you’ll earn those new sales that just showed up to see what you’d done to their childhood memory.  And if the stories aren’t working and the audience abandons you…

Urghh.

Trust me.  They’ll put it all back.

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Enron accounting got us to this number, but close your eyes and go with it.

Now, I just read the issue that introduces the new outfit –  #600  went on sale a couple of days ago.

First off:  The book is primarily a nostalgia piece, as most anniversary issues are.  There’s a touching Gail Simone/George Perez curtain call for the excellent era of the late eighties when Perez was running the show near the top, and there’s some fun pin-ups and short stories about aspects of the character all through.  And of course, the requisite T&A, where appropriate.

The new costume in action.

But the most important part of the book was the introduction to the story we’ll be getting in the next year or so…the new costume, and what seems like a completely new reality to Wonder Woman’s environment, for now.  It’s the PERFECT bit of tease, with just the right amount of fun and mystery to encourage you to pick the next issue.  We’re giving glimpses of things, a sense of magic (important in Wonder Woman), a fun bit of ass-kicking in the new costume, and a promise that more will be revealed next month.  I wished this particular story was longer…which is the feeling the editor wants you to have.

So, the new direction is exactly the right call.  It’s not the costume I’d have designed, but it’s exactly the same editorial decision I would have made.

Good luck, Princess.  I for one, will be back next month to see what’s up with all this.
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And now, because it’s my blog, and I can do what I want…we’ll end with a few  shots of women I find ALMOST as attractive as my wife, in Wonder Woman costumes.

First: Rhona Mitra, from Boston Legal (amongst other things)

WAY better than the sexy nurse costume.

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And now, Megan Fox.    I suspect this might have been photoshop work, but I’m trying to figure out how to care.

Someone slap my eyes back into consciousness.

Ty the Guy OUT!

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Some Unseen, and some SHOULD be unseen

Hey folks.

Over the weeks and months, I’m always drawing little things that have nothing to do with my job, but are still kind of fun to see anyway.  So, this being my blog, I get to put anything on here I want, nyah!

First up…it was my brother’s fiftieth birthday last week, and I got him a card.  Well, I never get ANYONE a card, it’s always so much cheaper to just draw one.  Unless you count the fact that the time I take could be spent earning money to buy a card, and then they’re bloody expensive.

Either way, this is my brother’s B-Day card.  It’s reproduced here online roughly size as.  And it looks like him, more or less, you can check it out here…(though Brad thinks he has more hair than this.  Dreaming, my brother.)

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I had some correspondence to do with Joe Giella last week, and since Joe is still doing the MARY WORTH comic strip every day, I thought it would be fun to send him a sketch of his own character on the outside of the package, done in the Joe Giella style (it’s not a swipe, though, it’s just me “doing” Joe).

Mary Worth. For those folks who think Miss Marple is "too sexy".

And finally,  just a quick comment about the JONAH HEX movie.

Um.  Guys….

Why did you make a Jonah Hex movie?

I’m actually a fan of the comic book (it’s been fairly wonderful for years, despite anemic sales), but it’s silly to pretend the character is much beloved or well remembered by a generation of movie-goers and comic fans.  B-List would be a kind phrase.  Certainly he’s not a big enough character to lure in large enough crowds back to the western genre, which has been clinically dead at the box office for decades.   And from the looks of the AWFUL trailer, they’d added some pointless supernatural nonsense to the story, which meant it wasn’t even a real Jonah Hex movie.  On paper this movie has nothing going for it, I’m afraid to say.

But it does have this sort of thing, so you know, it's not ALL bad. Or are we all supposed to hate this woman now? I'm never sure what's expected of me.

It opened last weekend to a box office return of five million.  And that’s with some legitimate stars in it like Brolin, Malkovich, and the above pictured Megan Fox.  And to be honest, that’s about the box office I expected from it.

THIS is a DC movie, my friends. THIS is what they give us.

It’s not that I mind anyone making a Jonah Hex movie in principle.  (I’ll probably see this on video in a few months).    It’s just that there are SO many DC movies to make BEFORE the Jonah Hex movie that it’s mind boggling.  What is DC/Warner thinking this last decade?  The iconic characters, Wonder Woman, Flash, Aquaman, and others, all flop around in development and go nowhere, while they’re shelving these CASH COW characters for  Constantine, and the Losers?  Captain Marvel or Plastic Man movies are no where in sight, but there’s room on the schedule for STEEL and Jonah Hex?!?

No matter how truly excellent both STEEL and Jonah Hex might be, as pieces of auteur classic film making.  They’re still no damn World’s Finest movie, if you catch my drift.

Meanwhile, Marvel is a machine.  Spider-Man, X-Men, and Iron Man franchises all making A-List blockbuster movies, plus a fun set of B-List money makers like Fantastic Four, Daredevil, Kick Ass (closing in on a hundred million in world wide sales this week).  All because they seem to be in the business of making entertainment for a mass audience, instead of whatever the hell DC/Warner is doing.

I’ve heard through my sources that the well know SCALPHUNTER film treatment that’s been drifting around Hollywood has just been green lighted, and the epic AIR WAVE movie trilogy that was shelved by New World twelve years ago is up and running again.  As is the Sea Devils direct to youtube series.   God Help Us.

"Us make-um big wampum with right actor attached."

Ah, there’s always the GREEN LANTERN film to come along and ruin my theory be being really good.  Don’t hold your breath, though.

PS:

I have a theory about why there’s no Wonder Woman movie in production.  Who could wear this costume as convincingly?

Best Live Action Super-Hero Performer Ever.

Okay, I'm not being fair.

TY THE GUY OUT!

The Top Seven Comics Creators who can KICK YOUR ASS

Oooh...tough guys!

Last week saw the release of KICK-ASS a promising Comic Book Movie with a tepid box office on opening weekend.  Industry types were somewhat surprised, as the title and premise suggested a bigger response, but those of us in the know expected it.  You can’t fake KICK-ASS, it has to be in your blood, your pores and in your gonads, my friends, or the audience knows.

As much as I admire the work of Mark Millar and John Romita Jr, the creators of this epic story, I simply cannot in good conscious call them KICK-ASS examples of the male species.  While Millar is British, and therefore has soccer hooliganism in his DNA, Mr. Romita is an average-sized man, with straight teeth and no criminal record to speak of.   I’d feel fairly confident facing either of them in a bar fight, and I’m willing to go in sober and unarmed.

But the world of comics DOES include some of the most stunningly macho examples of man-flesh in the history of the visual arts, and you should know about them, if only to avoid their supremely terrifying gaze if they appear at conventions.

Be afraid fanboys, of—

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THE TOP SEVEN COMIC CREATORS WHO COULD LITERALLY KICK YOUR ASS.

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#7

Ken Lashley

No, he's not standing on a box. Everyone else is just that small.

Currently illustrating The Flash.

You know that scene in Jurassic Park where the water is jiggling in the cups, so you know there’s a giant dinosaur coming?  That’s based on Ken Lashley.

Ken is the largest human in the comic industry, if not in western civilization.  At seven foot nine, eight hundred and sixty pounds (and none of it fat), the only reason he doesn’t play professional football is that “it wouldn’t be fair to the other players”.  I’m big, but whenever I’m in a room with Ken, he makes me feel like a skinny schoolgirl in knee high socks, with a Hello Kitty backpack.  Seriously.

He happens to be a pleasant, quiet, somewhat reserved individual, however, which is a disappointment to lovers of ass-kicking manly misbehavior the world over.  I never thought it was part of Ken’s character to be aggressive — until I saw his cover for Excalibur #73

This is the single most testosterone-fueled drawing I’ve ever seen.  It’s an existential scream of pure maleness rarely witnessed outside of Heavy Metal Gay Snuff-porn.  This image of a blue-balled demon radiating nuclear energy from his dick while magnetically attracting the red lady, makes anyone viewing it more manly by 25% — including any girls.  And AFTER seeing this illustration, if any of you go out and kick someone’s ass, Ken Lashley officially gets the assist.

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#6

Charles Moulton (aka Dr. William Moulton Marston).

We had no idea what this man was up to...

This Y-chromosome-soaked head-shrinker helped create three amazing

The good doctor knew that real men liked this sort of thing. And real women.

legacies for himself in the 20th Century.  One was the polygraph machine (the Lie Detector) which has done more to fight crime than a squad room full of cops on a lifetime steroid binge–another was the fictional queen of lesbo bondage adventure, Wonder Woman.

But Dr. Will got his high testosterone scores in a much more impressive way.   He was in an openly poly-amorous relationship with two ladies his entire life–  had kids with both women– and the one he WASN’T legally married to, was the one he based Wonder Woman on.  Anyone who could keep TWO sexy bisexual fetish-doms happy for a lifetime of tied-up joy had to be producing twice the man-sauce you and I were issued at birth and could easily pound our weak asses into the sand without breaking a sweat.   Trust me.

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#5

Jim Steranko

This Nick Fury artist had a comic career that was finished and done forty-five years ago — it lasted for maybe four months — and he’s STILL considered one of the most influential artists who ever worked.  The balls it takes to be THAT good at something and walk away from it is impressive enough, but it’s par for the course for the Most Interesting Man in Comics.  Let’s take a look at a recent photo of this senior citizen to give you a sense of his essence.

"Last week I punched that Dos Equus guy in the face, just to win a five dollar bet."

Steranko was born tough. Instead of spending his youth PLAYING Grand Theft Auto on his mommy’s couch with his brother’s game system, Teen-Steranko stole actual cars, and occasionally got arrested for it.  That experience in the lock-up inspired him to become a circus escape artist, where laughing at thick, manly chains is in the job description.

But even this wasn’t enough for Jim (Grand Cojones) Steranko, who permanently moved into the he-man badass club-for-life when he became a professional sword swallower and FIRE-EATER.

You read that right, bitches. I can literally breathe fire.

Now you know why Steranko could write the adventures of spy-stud Nick Fury with such authority, and why he insisted on calling Nick the “ramrod” of SHIELD.

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#4

Jack (King) Kirby

Who, but an authentic tough guy, could rock this plaid dinner jacket?

We all know that Kirby was THE hardest working man in the history of comics who could write and draw an entire comic book in five days, and it would STILL be better than the one that took you three months.    But besides being an authentic artistic genius, Jolly Jack was an authentic war hero of epic proportion.

MANLY MOMENT #1: When he found out he was going to be drafted, Kirby didn’t go get drunk and beg the local girls for a “shipping-out-tomorrow” roll in the hay…instead he WORKED TWICE AS MANY HOURS PER DAY to double his already astounding output, and stockpile enough pages to continuing publishing his titles without missing an issue while he personally punched out the Nazi war machine.

MANLY MOMENT #2: While sleeping in an infantry foxhole in the winter of ’44 Kirby got frostbite, and was shipped to a hospital where a doctor wanted to take his legs.  Jack said no, and just to show off, he forced the circulation back into his limbs by power of his own male  will.

MANLY MOMENT #3: When a commanding officer discovered Kirby could draw, he started sending Jack out ALONE at night to sketch the terrain and draw maps of enemy territory.   Kirby went behind enemy lines armed with a pencil and paper.  Eat that, pussies.

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#3

Mike Grell

Nothing manly to see here. Move along.

“Iron” Mike has so much more going for him than being the creator of THE WARLORD (who is that half-naked dude with a giant helmet and a big broadsword who ISN’T Conan).  To begin with, anyone who’s named after a foundry metal without a trace of irony is already tougher than anyone you’ve ever met.

But Grell gets his he-man cred the old fashioned way. He’s the Ted Nugent of comics — a big game hunter who delights in personally killing and eating the larger creatures of our world, often with no more than an arrow, a knife and his own teeth.  Though I don’t share his love of blood sports, I do share his carnivorous taste buds, and while having lunch with him at a convention a while ago, I brought it up.  He told me that he refuses to eat any creature unless he’s already killed at least one of their species.  “I’ve cut the throats of chickens, ducks, geese…I’ve butchered my own cow.  I feel I owe it to the meals I eat,” he said to me, with an expression I refuse to describe as “Lecter-like”.  I can’t argue with the logic, but I told him it meant he could never enjoy a crocodile steak or shark-fin soup — two meals I have tasted in my travels.  His response, I swear to god:  “I haven’t eaten shark fin soup….yet.”

If this thing in front of me was alive, I'd have eaten it by now.

Brrrr.

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#2

Bill Mauldin

As the creator of the extremely popular WWII comic series, “Willie and Joe”, Bill Mauldin was the first, last and only cartoonist whose job required him TO BE SHOT AT TO MEET DEADLINES.

Bill Mauldin: He don't look like much, do he?

While with the 45th Infantry, Bill was part of the invasion of Sicily, sketching cartoons about frontline life for “The 45th Division News”, in between dodging live rounds.   These cartoons became popular enough that Bill was transferred to Stars and Stripes for the duration and told to produce the adventures of Willie and Joe as a matter of vital national need.   Any man with a normal set of testes would have hopped a jeep for the rear and started sharpening pencils, gleeful to be out of danger, but not Bill.  Instead he asked for his own jeep, and spent the rest of the war DRIVING AROUND THE FRONT LINES looking for ideas.  And just to prove he wasn’t kidding around, in September of 1943, he had his drawing shoulder ripped apart by a German mortar while visiting a machine gun crew near Monte Cassino.  True to his granite-testicled manner, Bill used it as an opportunity to do a few cartoons about life in an army hospital and kept right on going.

MIND-BOGGLING MAN POINTS: General George Patton once threatened to court martial Mauldin for gross insubordination, but the cartoonist was rescued from discipline by none other than Supreme Allied Commander and future President, Dwight Eisenhower, who told Patton that Mauldin’s characters were essential for troop morale and to “leave him alone”.   Next time you get in trouble, wait and see if the MOST POWERFUL MAN ON THE PLANET shows up to have your back…

I'm not afraid of Nazis, but Bill Mauldin scared me yellow.

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#1

Larry Hama

Don't sneak up on this guy if you value your life.

Whatever those Nancies at Hasbro might think about inventing the famous American action figure with the Kung Fu grip, Larry Hama created GI Joe for a generation of fans, and knows more about macho conflict-fiction than anyone alive.  And lest you think his world of big guns and phallic-named characters was only the product of Larry’s wimpy imagination, you should know this:   Hama is an eighth-degree black belt in five different martial arts.  I don’t know what that eighth-degree means, because every time I ask about it, someone kicks my ass, but I figure being ANY black belt qualifies Larry to obliterate me with one hand.

And just in case Larry has to kill you from a distance, he’s a qualified marksman and weapons expert from his time in Viet Nam serving in the Army Corps of Engineers during the war.

And if that list of impressive man points hasn’t dropped you to your knees in supplication–Hama’s specialty in the Corps?

Demolition and explosives.

Fiery explosions and certain death. Larry Hama must be nearby.

So naturally, the single most goddamned dangerous man in the history of our medium ended up the editor of Wonder Woman comics.

He owed it to Dr. Moulton.

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That’s it for today.  My delicate, lily white ass cannot stand sitting for so long.  I have to lie down.

Ty the Guy

click here for more of Ty’s Top Seven lists

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