Hollywood relies on the summer blockbuster as an integral part of their fiscal year. Without the hundreds of millions worth of income the summer brings the studios, there would be no money left for the budgets of next year’s miserable bombs. So if you want any more Green Lanterns or John Carters to be made, you have to see this year’s crap to give them the liquidity.
But for those who just want to watch the cream of the crop, don’t worry, I’ve reviewed EVERY summer comic book movie, before any of them have come out. How can I do it?
I have mystic powers…
I know all…I see all…if only Hollywood came to me first, we could save everyone a lot of trouble.
Ty the Guy OUT!
When it comes to Comic Book based movies, there is only ONE possible bonus moment:
Isn’t Catching Fire (Hunger Games 2) out this summer?
Although I sort of fudged the rules with Lone Ranger and Star Trek, Hunger Games isn’t even remotely a comic book movie, as it’s adapted from a novel. At least Trek and Lone Ranger have had successful comic book runs.
Double my money back? Woohoo! (Wait. I paid no money. Rats.)
As for Iron Man 3? The post-credit sequence was easily the coolest yet.
Worth it just to see the bunny reading fish entrails!
This was my kid’s favourite thing as well. Who doesn’t love a good fish gutting gag?
300 II? Wouldn’t that be, like, 600?
I thought of that. Or, it could be 300/2 which would make it 150. Or 300 II, which is thirty-thousand and eleven. That’s a large number, so I take it seriously.
Kevin Smith and Hugh Hefner? There is no possible alternate universe, even if Kang and Immortus conspired together, where those two in a movie would be taken as an indication of quality.
T’was a twinge of irony in me heart when I discussed quality so high. But the film manages to be surprisingly awful, even with lowered expectations. It’s a sight to behold, but only if you have two hours otherwise spent in a concrete waiting room or a bus stop.
No briefs = grit and suffering
Love it!!! *HUGS*
I’m not on board with Jar Jar Abrams Trek, but I’m all in with the rest of your predictions. The summer of Deja Vu is here……..again.
Is Johnny Depp an official weirdo?
Hello. Where’s my money?